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Drabble: Welcome to the Pleasure Domes - Words in the Heroes' Tongue
I have a variable-sword. I urge calm.
Drabble: Welcome to the Pleasure Domes
Here is a double drabble that I almost titled ‘Crude And Obscure’, because it is, and most of you probably won’t get it. Read at your own risk. A triple crossover; ‘Conan the Barbarian’, ‘Discworld’, and ‘Neverwinter Nights 2’. 200 words, R.

Welcome To The Pleasure Domes

The nomad warlord drained his bowl of kumis and then addressed the warriors who were gathered in his yurt. “Tell me,” he said, “in what things in life can a man find the greatest pleasure?”

“Hah!” grunted one of his horde, “they are the cry of the eagle in the heights, the fall of snow in the forest, and a true arrow in your bow.”

“No,” said another nomad warrior, “the finest things in life are the open steppe, a fleet horse under you, a falcon at your wrist, and the wind in your hair.”

The warlord turned to the tallest of his three famous guests. “What is your opinion, Conan of Cimmeria?”

The mighty barbarian did not hesitate. “To crush your enemies, to see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentations of their women.”

The warlord nodded approvingly and turned to his next guest. “And yours, oh Ghenghiz Cohen?”

The elderly barbarian cleared his throat. “Hot water, good dentishtry, and soft lavatory paper.”

The warlord raised his eyebrows and looked to his final guest.

The Knight-Captain of Crossroads Keep furrowed his brows in thought. “Personally,” he said at last, “I’d go for a tit-fuck from Torio Claven.”

Tags: ,
Current Location: A yurt on the steppe

6 comments or speak 2 me
ffutures From: ffutures Date: September 29th, 2008 07:26 pm (UTC) (Link)
Trouble is I know none of the characters mentioned in the last line, so it's wasted on me.
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: October 3rd, 2008 07:09 am (UTC) (Link)
Yes, it only makes sense to those who know NWN2.

By the way, in your review of Dave Turner's 'Primeval' story 'Jabberwock' at TtH you complain that, in the show, the ARC team didn't think to use bat detectors to track the Future Predators. Not true. They did. Connor went to get one; when he returned with it he switched it on in the SUV and it immediately lit up - one of the FPs was right there. It smashed the car windows and Connor only just managed to escape. He had to leave the bat detector behind. As they found that dogs could also track the FPs they didn't bother about finding another detector - although perhaps they should have done for the ill-fated mission to the Permian.
melancthe From: melancthe Date: September 29th, 2008 09:20 pm (UTC) (Link)
As someone who stared with fascination at Torio's cleavage during every cutscene, this drabble amused me so very much. :)
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: October 3rd, 2008 07:10 am (UTC) (Link)
Thank you!
zanthinegirl From: zanthinegirl Date: September 30th, 2008 02:32 am (UTC) (Link)
I think that last line must be from Neverwinter Nights, which I don't know from Adam. Cute though!
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: October 3rd, 2008 07:11 am (UTC) (Link)
It is indeed; unfortunately it seems that only one person on my F-list plays NWN2.

6 comments or speak 2 me