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Drabble: Paternity Case - Words in the Heroes' Tongue
I have a variable-sword. I urge calm.
speakr2customrs
speakr2customrs
Drabble: Paternity Case
I was mimicking ff.net story summaries in a reply to a comment recently - OMG a gril cums 2 sunydale & falls 4 Zander hes reely teh sun of Hercule & Zena LOL - and it sparked a tiny plot bunny. My shotgun was out of reach, I couldn't stop the bunny, and it got me; luckily it was only carrying a Drabble. Not going to bother with a cut.

Paternity Case


Xander gave a big goofy grin. “So I’m not really a Harris? Outstanding! The son of Hercules and Xena. Mucho good news there. Famous parents, cool. What I always dreamed of. Do I get any cool superpowers? Like, skill with the chakram?”

Poirot stroked his magnificent moustache. “Alas, you have not inherited any of your mother’s strength or skill. Only her dark hair and, how you say, wisecracking. It seems you have inherited leetle from your father either. Not his famous leetle grey cells, that is certain. I did not say ‘Hercules’, I said ‘Hercule’. Xander, I am your father.’

Tags:
Current Mood: crazy crazy
Current Music: Big Country, "Harvest Home"

55 comments or speak 2 me
Comments
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bogwitch From: bogwitch Date: November 4th, 2004 05:23 am (UTC) (Link)
Oh dear.
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: November 4th, 2004 06:06 am (UTC) (Link)
Heh heh heh.
i_digress_uk From: i_digress_uk Date: November 4th, 2004 05:31 am (UTC) (Link)
You are a sick, sick man. Keep it up!
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: November 4th, 2004 06:06 am (UTC) (Link)
I will!
hieispike From: hieispike Date: November 4th, 2004 05:51 am (UTC) (Link)
This just cracks me up. I mean, Xena/Hercule Poirot? *giggles*

Xander, I am your father. (Kinda like Darth Vader, too...)

speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: November 4th, 2004 06:05 am (UTC) (Link)
The Darth Vader reference is deliberate, mon petit.
hurry_sundown From: hurry_sundown Date: November 4th, 2004 06:03 am (UTC) (Link)
Hee! *kiss* Thanks, Speaker - I needed that.
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: November 4th, 2004 06:09 am (UTC) (Link)
Merci, mon amie!
ljs From: ljs Date: November 4th, 2004 06:17 am (UTC) (Link)
I'm possibly scarred for life.
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: November 4th, 2004 04:41 pm (UTC) (Link)
Courage, my colleagues! We shall lecture the suspects in the library, and unmask the scoundrel responsible with the aid of your investigative and acquisitive skills, my leetle grey cells, and the obtuse and bungling assistance of my devoted Captain Hastings (the real father of Willow Rosenburg) and my secretary Miss Lemon (now revealed to be an alias of Halfrek).
missmurchison From: missmurchison Date: November 4th, 2004 06:21 am (UTC) (Link)
BWAH!
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: November 4th, 2004 04:41 pm (UTC) (Link)
Snicker!
appomattoxco From: appomattoxco Date: November 4th, 2004 06:58 am (UTC) (Link)
There are leetle tears, the laughter it iz so hard!
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: November 4th, 2004 04:44 pm (UTC) (Link)
Merci!
julia_here From: julia_here Date: November 4th, 2004 07:31 am (UTC) (Link)
Evil! Evil!

Now I have toast crumbs on the monitor!

Julia, giggling foolishly
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: November 4th, 2004 04:45 pm (UTC) (Link)
The toast crumbs, they must not get on my patent leather shoes! Or in my most magnificent moustache!
cbtreks From: cbtreks Date: November 4th, 2004 08:56 am (UTC) (Link)
That is laugh-out-loud-at-work funny. Do I even want to try to explain the humor to my coworkers?
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: November 4th, 2004 04:47 pm (UTC) (Link)
I think not, mon amie. It may be, how you say, lost in translation.
agilebrit From: agilebrit Date: November 4th, 2004 09:10 am (UTC) (Link)
Bwahahahahahahhahhahahahaaa!!!!

OMH, that's the funniest thing I've read in quite some time. I am so glad that I didn't have a mouthful of anything when I got to the end.

You...are a genius.
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: November 4th, 2004 04:48 pm (UTC) (Link)
Merci. I owe it all to the leetle grey cells.
violethamster From: violethamster Date: November 4th, 2004 10:17 am (UTC) (Link)
*snorfle*

I'm totally picturing Xena and Hercule Poirot together. Kill me now.
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: November 4th, 2004 04:52 pm (UTC) (Link)
Sometime I'm going to actually write this. I can't help it. "Murder on the Acropolis", perhaps. Agatha Christie did do Poirot in "The Labours of Hercules" - I think I'll do it and, of course, chuck Xena into the mix.
calove From: calove Date: November 4th, 2004 02:58 pm (UTC) (Link)
Promise me you will never shoot your bunnies. Bunnies this good deserve to live.
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: November 4th, 2004 04:55 pm (UTC) (Link)
I don't just shoot like everybody supposes
Sometimes I capture one and do what it proposes
And what's with all the plotlines
What do I need such good ideas for anyway?
Bunnies, bunnies, bunnies,
Sometimes they're funnies

Or maybe punnies.
desdemonaspace From: desdemonaspace Date: November 4th, 2004 05:30 pm (UTC) (Link)
This is the first laugh I've had in days. (Since Black Tuesday.) Thanks!
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: November 4th, 2004 05:47 pm (UTC) (Link)
Merci!
(Deleted comment)
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: November 5th, 2004 03:36 am (UTC) (Link)
Thx! U R gr8.
enigmaticblues From: enigmaticblues Date: November 4th, 2004 09:19 pm (UTC) (Link)
Only you could come up with a plot bunny from such a review. Which is probably a mark of genius. Very funny. :)
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: November 5th, 2004 03:37 am (UTC) (Link)
And I have a magnificent moustache, non?
55 comments or speak 2 me
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