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Happy birthday Frimfram! and a ficlet 'Kinda Like Buck Rogers' - Words in the Heroes' Tongue
I have a variable-sword. I urge calm.
Happy birthday Frimfram! and a ficlet 'Kinda Like Buck Rogers'

Happy birthday dear frimfram, happy birthday to you

This is not specifically a birthday fic; in fact it is intended more for liz_marcs, who has recently discovered ‘Futurama’. This is the fourth part of a series that began as a Xander-in-Africa double drabble and is now a BtVS/Futurama crossover. It follows on from Xander of the River, Again Xander, and If A Picture Paints A Thousand Herds. A 400-word double-double drabble. PG, if that.

Kinda Like Buck Rogers

Xander stared at the strange old man. “It’s kinda, well, incredible,” he said. “I’ve been dead for, like, a thousand years? And I’ve been brought back through a picture?”

“With my amazing image re-animation process,” Professor Farnsworth confirmed.

“Hey, I’m from the twentieth century too,” Fry said. “I fell into, uh, a sort of freezing sleeping thing. It’s cool to have somebody else from my time here. Although, the last couple of times really didn’t work out too well.”

“You only have one eye,” Xander said to Leela. “Uh, sorry, I guess that’s kinda rude.”

“It’s the truth,” said Leela. “And you only have one eye too. So we have something in common.” Fry’s smile turned into a hostile glare directed at Xander.

“And you’re a lobster,” Xander said to Zoidberg. “And there’s a robot.”

“Well, bite my shiny metal ass,” Bender said. “Are all humans from the twentieth century dumb? Though, then again, stupid question. Thirty-first century ones are dumb, why should I expect any different from the prehistoric ones?”

Xander shook his head slowly. “Look, this is all kinda weird to me. Maybe I’ll get used to it later but I think that, right now, I need to splash my face with some cold water.”

“The bathroom’s right over there,” Professor Farnsworth said.

“Thanks.” Xander made his way to the bathroom with slightly wobbly steps. He pulled open the door and was confronted by a wildebeest. The ungainly creature thrust its long snout towards Xander, tossed its head, and bleated.

Xander yelped in surprise. He jumped backwards, gasped for breath, and fainted.

“He’s dead,” Bender deduced. “Poor old prehistoric guy. I call dibs on anything he has in his pockets.”

Leela bent to examine Xander’s limp form. “He’s breathing,” she said. “Zoidberg, can you do anything?”

“I can do many things,” Zoidberg said. “I can sing, I can dance, I can devour small marine creatures, I can even do flower arranging. Hooray for Zoidberg!”

Leela rolled her eye. “I’m axing you to examine him,” she said.

“Oh, yes, I can do that,” Zoidberg replied. “I have a diploma.” He lifted up Xander’s wrist and felt for a pulse, commanded the unconscious Xander to say ‘Ah’, and then placed his head against Xander’s chest and listened. “His heart is beating,” Zoidberg announced. “He has only fainted. My diagnosis is that he is suffering from the shock of the gnu.”

Next in series: Oddly Familiar Somehow

Tags: , , , ,
Current Location: The Planet Express office
Current Music: Futurama theme

21 comments or speak 2 me
booster17 From: booster17 Date: May 23rd, 2007 09:58 am (UTC) (Link)
....Xander really would fit in disturbing well, wouldn't he?

Excellent voice on all of them. Though Leela is 'axing' Zoiberg at the end for some reason. :)
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: May 23rd, 2007 10:04 am (UTC) (Link)

The 'axing' is canon. The language has changed in a few tiny ways by that time and one is the replacement of 'ask' by 'ax'.
From: beer_good_foamy Date: May 23rd, 2007 10:33 am (UTC) (Link)
he is suffering from the shock of the gnu


*reads it again*


*reads it again*

*snickers helplessly*

Puntastic as always. You're gnuts, but I love it.
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: May 24th, 2007 10:52 am (UTC) (Link)
Thank ewe!
bogwitch From: bogwitch Date: May 23rd, 2007 11:43 am (UTC) (Link)
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: May 24th, 2007 10:55 am (UTC) (Link)
jgracio From: jgracio Date: May 23rd, 2007 12:19 pm (UTC) (Link)
I can actually hear Zoidberg speak... Awesome.
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: May 24th, 2007 11:00 am (UTC) (Link)
Thank you!
ffutures From: ffutures Date: May 23rd, 2007 12:53 pm (UTC) (Link)
Well, he was looking for a wash bison.
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: May 24th, 2007 11:20 am (UTC) (Link)
You got me back there!
liz_marcs From: liz_marcs Date: May 23rd, 2007 02:06 pm (UTC) (Link)

You always nail me with puns.

That last line killed me. *throws confetti*
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: May 24th, 2007 11:22 am (UTC) (Link)
Bite my shiny metal ass, human! *sweeps up confetti and resells it*
frimfram From: frimfram Date: May 23rd, 2007 02:23 pm (UTC) (Link)
Heheh! Well, I don't know the 'verse, but S2C humour would be recognisable and wonderfully groanworthy anywhere ^_^
Thanks for the birthday wishes!
curiouswombat From: curiouswombat Date: May 23rd, 2007 08:34 pm (UTC) (Link)
What? You've never watched Futurama? You really must if you get the chance. Especially as Leela is so much the antithesis of almost every other 'cartoon' female!
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: May 24th, 2007 11:58 am (UTC) (Link)
Glad you liked it.

You have to see the birthday wish that CW put up on her LJ.
woman_of_ From: woman_of_ Date: May 23rd, 2007 04:10 pm (UTC) (Link)
I love these gnu puns, and another excellent one!
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: May 24th, 2007 12:00 pm (UTC) (Link)
Thank ewe!
gillo From: gillo Date: May 23rd, 2007 10:04 pm (UTC) (Link)
Somehow I gnu it would be that sort of pun but it still had a sledgehammer effect when I got there.

speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: May 24th, 2007 12:04 pm (UTC) (Link)
I'm not looking for a gnu England...
cbtreks From: cbtreks Date: May 24th, 2007 12:22 am (UTC) (Link)
Very funny and your characterizations are perfect.

I find it a little disturbing that I got to the end and wondered how the rest of the story would go....
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: May 24th, 2007 12:05 pm (UTC) (Link)
Thank you!

There will be future instalments on an occasional basis as gnu ideas occur to me.
21 comments or speak 2 me