October 2nd, 2008


Faster than what?

Having spent time today at the Pit of Voles, and at Twisting the Hellmouth (where the moderators are supposed to enforce correct spelling and grammar but don’t), can I just point out to the world in general the difference between ‘lightening’ and ‘lightning’?

If someone is described as moving at ‘lightening’ speed does this mean that they have been pumped full of helium or that they’re moving as fast as a hairdresser applying highlights?

When a group of ‘Forgotten Realms’ characters are travelling through the forest, and are attacked by a pack of Dire Wolves, is there really a lot of point in them defending themselves with a Wand of Lightening? Is the idea that it’s better to be attacked by a forty pound creature than a two hundred pound one? Or is the idea to confuse the beasts? ‘Hey, when I started this charge, my fur was black; now I’m grey. I must have been struck by an ageing ray and I should dodder off back to my cave and chew bones while I wait for my teeth to fall out.’ I don’t think so. Just spell the word right in the first place, okay, guys?

Oh, and certain characters did not travel by camel across the dessert. The camel's hooves are well adapted to crossing sand but not trifle, gateau, cheesecake and ice cream. It could get messy.

And monks do not practice marital arts. It rather defeats the point of being a monk.