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Ficlet: Island of Lost Trolls - Words in the Heroes' Tongue
I have a variable-sword. I urge calm.
speakr2customrs
speakr2customrs
Ficlet: Island of Lost Trolls
I was hoping to post a new ‘Dojo Hard’ chapter today as a birthday tribute to spikeshunny but I don’t think that I’m going to make it. I have to go into work this afternoon to do a training course, even though I’m technically on holiday, and I couldn’t stay awake long enough last night. This morning I went to ‘Twisting the Hellmouth’ to read the reviews for the latest ‘Tabula Avatar’ chapter and I’m afraid I was distracted by a challenge there. I ended up writing something else instead, and I’m afraid it would be no use as a birthday ficlet. The challenge is called ‘Where did Olaf the Troll go?’ and deals with what would happen if Willow’s spell in ‘Triangle’ had missed the Land of the Trolls and sent Olaf into another fandom. I’ve already posted one such drabble at TtH and two on my Greatest Journal, but this is the first time that I’ve posted one here. A 500 word ficlet examining one possibility...


Island of Lost Trolls


Sayid stopped in mid-sentence as a deep growl sounded from within the bushes. The vegetation shook as something moved through it towards them. Something big.

“Oh my God,” Shannon gasped.

“What the hell is that?” Boone exclaimed.

Kate took a step backwards. “Something’s coming.”

“It’s coming towards us,” Charlie said uneasily.

“Come on, let’s move,” Kate snapped, and she spun around and ran. All the others followed except for Sawyer.

Suddenly a voice in the bushes bellowed “Ho, bear, I have you now! I shall crush you with my mighty hammer!” The voice was answered with a roar and a series of furious snarls. The bushes shook and thrashed.

Sawyer saw glimpses of white fur and red hair and something metal glinting in the sun. He put his hand to the butt of his gun. Suddenly there was the sound of a heavy impact, a concussive thud that could have been a pile-driver, and the snarling was replaced by whimpers. There was another thud, an interval of silence, and then the tread of heavy footsteps that made the ground tremble. The bushes parted.

Into sight walked a huge figure. Well over six feet tall, perhaps even approaching seven feet, and massively built. Human in shape, although the horns and greenish skin told a different story, and Sawyer’s mouth dropped open. The giant held a crudely forged hammer in one hand and carried the corpse of a polar bear slung across his shoulders. He smiled at Sawyer. “Hail, fellow,” he greeted. “You are a brave man, although puny, for you did not run from the snow bear. I greet you. I am Olaf, lord of trolls.”

The runners had stopped and turned around. They stared wide-eyed at the approaching figure. “Oh my God, it’s a polar bear,” Shannon gasped.

“A polar bear here is weird, yeah,” said Kate, “but oh my God, troll.”

“Hail,” Olaf called out. “It is good to see other people in this strange place. Was your longship wrecked on these shores?”

“Longship?” Sawyer repeated. “We were in a plane crash.” He saw Olaf’s brows crease up in apparent puzzlement. “Uh, a flying machine.”

“A flying machine?” Olaf’s eyes narrowed. “Are any of you witches? I hate witches.”

“No, we’re not witches,” Kate told him.

Olaf beamed. “Good. Then we can be friends.” He peered at Sayid. “A Moor? You have the look of a warrior, even though you fled from the bear.”

Sayid shrugged. “I have no weapon.”

“Hah! Good sense. Then I do not despise you, Moor, although I pity you, for you cannot share the pleasures of ale and mead.” Olaf tipped the bear from his shoulders and it crashed to the ground. “This is a good day for a lonely troll. We should celebrate. There is honey on this island, and I have brewed mead. We shall feast on roast bear meat, and drink much mead, and then,” he leered at Kate and Shannon, “I shall make merry sport with your more attractive females.”

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29 comments or speak 2 me
Comments
kcarolj65 From: kcarolj65 Date: July 25th, 2006 10:15 am (UTC) (Link)
Hee! Great Olaf voice. I always loved that line, "I shall make merry sport with your more attractive females."
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: July 26th, 2006 02:12 pm (UTC) (Link)
It's one of my favourite quotes from the entire show, and I have it in my sidebar (although there put into the mouth of Winnie the Pooh).
ffutures From: ffutures Date: July 25th, 2006 10:39 am (UTC) (Link)
Hope they remember not to eat the liver, polar bear liver is toxic to humans.

Do they have any babies in Lost? I seem to remember that as one of Olaf's other tastes...

Anyway, fun ficlet. I shall now have to take a look at greatest Journal again, I haven't been on there in a month or so.
ffutures From: ffutures Date: July 25th, 2006 10:41 am (UTC) (Link)
Oh, one thought - Olaf wouldn't have his hammer: Buffy kept it. You might want to say something to indicate he made another.
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: July 25th, 2006 11:32 am (UTC) (Link)
I've amended it. I've changed 'mighty hammer' to 'crudely forged hammer' and dropped a word elsewhere to keep it at 500 words.
paratti From: paratti Date: July 25th, 2006 10:58 am (UTC) (Link)
Hee:)
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: July 26th, 2006 02:13 pm (UTC) (Link)
Thank you!
quinara From: quinara Date: July 25th, 2006 11:17 am (UTC) (Link)
This is fantastic.

And 'flying machine' makes me think of the gnomes in Warcraft II... :D
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: July 26th, 2006 02:14 pm (UTC) (Link)
Thank you! There are flying machines in the Baldur's Gate games too, although they never actually fly in-game.
bogwitch From: bogwitch Date: July 25th, 2006 11:29 am (UTC) (Link)
Hee!

But I feel sorry for the bear. I love polar bears.
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: July 26th, 2006 02:15 pm (UTC) (Link)
Thank you!

Olaf likes polar bears too. Well roasted and washed down with copious quantities of ale.
spikeshunny From: spikeshunny Date: July 25th, 2006 11:38 am (UTC) (Link)
Thank youuuuuuuuuuu!!

You're a diamond. And don't worry when you're ready to post give me a heads up!!!
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: July 26th, 2006 02:15 pm (UTC) (Link)
Hope you had a good birthday!
zanthinegirl From: zanthinegirl Date: July 25th, 2006 11:57 am (UTC) (Link)
Hee! And why shouldn't it be Olaf? Do we actually know he was sent back to Troll-land? Very cute!
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: July 26th, 2006 02:22 pm (UTC) (Link)
From the challenge conditions at TtH:

"Transcript from Triangle episode:

Olaf dissolves into nothing and disappears. Willow smiles hugely. Shot of Tara watching.
Buffy: (OS) Where did you send him?
Anya: (OS) The land of the trolls.
We see them all standing around in the magic shop.
Anya: He'll like it there. Full of trolls.
Willow: It's hard to be precise, though. Alternate universes don't stay put. Trying to send him to a specific place is sort of like ... like ... trying to hit a ... puppy, by throwing a live bee at it. (They all look at her) Which is a weird image, and you should all just forget it.
Anya: It's possible that he's in the land of perpetual Wednesday ... or the crazy melty land ... or, you know, the world without shrimp.


So where did Olaf go? Is he in Anitaverse? Or chasing Dean and Sam around? Maybe he just stepped out of the stargate. It's up to you to figure it out.

Pick anywhere and drop Olaf in and write about the chaos. Write a series of drabbles about him being sent from place to place or write a longer story about him in one place."

A couple of other people have answered the challenge, but only I have taken it this far.
zanthinegirl From: zanthinegirl Date: July 26th, 2006 03:34 pm (UTC) (Link)
I just googled "Twisting the Hellmouth"; what a cool site! I can already see that there are quite a few new ideas there! Though clearly never having watched "Stargate SG1" may prove a handicap...
(Deleted comment)
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: July 26th, 2006 02:28 pm (UTC) (Link)
Thank you!

A flying longship features in 'Noggin the Nog'.
mefnord From: mefnord Date: July 25th, 2006 02:20 pm (UTC) (Link)
Hee! *g*
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: July 26th, 2006 02:29 pm (UTC) (Link)
Thank you!
lilred26x From: lilred26x Date: July 25th, 2006 02:33 pm (UTC) (Link)
Very cute!
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: July 26th, 2006 02:29 pm (UTC) (Link)
Thank you!
hesadevil From: hesadevil Date: July 25th, 2006 03:53 pm (UTC) (Link)
And so the mysery of the island is solved. It was the result of Willow's wonky wtchiness.

Bows to your superior cross-over abilities - for your pen is a mighty weapon.

speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: July 26th, 2006 02:31 pm (UTC) (Link)
Nothing can defeat the penis!
miriya_2099 From: miriya_2099 Date: July 25th, 2006 04:41 pm (UTC) (Link)
Love it.
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: July 26th, 2006 02:31 pm (UTC) (Link)
Thank you!
makd From: makd Date: July 26th, 2006 02:29 am (UTC) (Link)
I LOVE your Olaf fics. [giggles, remembering the Olaf/Joyce fic.)
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: July 26th, 2006 02:32 pm (UTC) (Link)
Thank you! I think a lot of people will remember the Olaf/Joyce fic...
cbtreks From: cbtreks Date: August 2nd, 2006 12:55 am (UTC) (Link)
I suspect that if Olaf the Troll had really showed up on the island, more people might still be alive. Though I might fear for baby Aaron!
speakr2customrs From: speakr2customrs Date: August 2nd, 2006 02:23 am (UTC) (Link)
And I'd have kept watching the show after the first two episodes.
29 comments or speak 2 me